Is love really blind?

In Short

yes, love is blind, somwhat. Let me explain.

Love is blind because when you love someone, you fail to see the mishaps in the person's actions and character.

In a sense, love makes you view the person you love as an idealized version of themselves rather than an actual reflection of their character.

In Long

Love is blind because people want to see and only see the postive aspects of their loved ones.

This is probably due to the fact that we treat them like they are part of our character, and since we are narcissists at heart, any negative opinion of them translates to a bad opinion of us.

If you want proof, simply think about a person you love, they can be:

• Your Mother;
• Your Father;
• Brother;
• Sister;
• Girlfriend/Boyfriend/Wife/Husband;
• etc.

Imagine if another person (it doesn't matter who; they can even be a stranger) calls this person, your loved one, cheap, alcoholic, lazy, promiscuous, etc. How would you feel?

The natural reaction would be to become defensive and say stuff like "That's ridiculous" or "That's not true at all!" or "They did that because of [reason]." or "Who are you to judge? You have no idea what you're talking about!".

You see? Any negative opinion of your loved ones hurts you, so it is natural to be somewhat forgiving to the people you love of their vices and wrongdoings.

But this also means that we have bias toward the people we love; we seldom see the bad things and more of the good things in their character.

Thus the phrase "Love is blind".

There is of course a limit to this fantasy, once we get to know the person more in a personal-level, we discover facts that are not so pleasant to know.

It is only a matter of time when we will realize that the person we are in-love with or just love in general is not so perfect, they have faults, faults that has always been there in plain sight but failed to notice.

Sometimes, love is also blind because of our sense of loss aversion. This is especially true for current lovers who were ex-lovers before.

As humans, we naturally don't want to waste the time, resource, and emotional energy that we have invested in our goals or relationships.

In relationships, this can become really tricky because we may mistake our sense of loss aversion for love, which, if we submit to it, makes us no different than addicted gamblers.

How does this knowledge affect our daily lives?

We cannot trust our opinions when observing the character of our loved ones; getting accurate insights about our loved ones character is near impossible, or just straight-up impossible.

To get a clearer idea of what kind of person your loved ones are, check out their friends and their peers. What kind of people are they? Because chances are, their qualities may share with your loved one's qualities, and you just did not notice it until now.

Also, rely on an outsider's perspective (acquaintances or a friend of a friend of your loved one) if possible. They are perfect judgers, because unlike you, they are not restrained by the bias you have.